When I'm Skinny, You Can Call Me Bitch.

When you go to a Tony Robbins seminar, part of what you learn is about nutrition and how different foods affect your body, mind, and overall well-being, and how important the acid/alkaline balance is.  At the end he asks you to commit to a 10-day cleanse.  I did the seminar, committed to the cleanse, and hung on full blast for almost two months. 

The cleanse is basically being vegan, but at the same time being very alkaline.  This really limits what you can eat.  (In a nutshell, all foods are either more acid or more alkaline, and you want to be more alkaline.  It has to do with the pH balance of your body and how your body holds onto fat and stuff and blah blah blah.  I lost 8 lbs in about 3 weeks.  Sign up for this website and download a list of foods here.  It's super-dee handy.)    

Basically, this cleanse entails:  no dairy, no meat, no animal products of any kind, nothing processed, no white sugar or flour, nothing fermented (so no vinegar or alcohol).  I know I'm missing something.  Oh, nothing canned.   No smoking, no stimulants of any kind including caffeine.  No fruit juices unless you squeeze those bitches yourself.  Sounds like goddam torture, doesn't it?!  Yaaaa, baby.

It's f*cking hard.  It's one of the most disciplined things I've ever done in my life.  But it's awesome.  You spend the first week drying out, which sucks, but after that it is almost addictive.  What's pulling me back right now is the weight loss, and it's healthy weight loss, not all stress your heart and your hair falls out weight loss.  Your skin - glowing.  Your period - practically nothing.  Your attitude (after the first week) - f*cking righteous!!  I've never felt better. 

Tony Robbins is a slick muthaf*cka. 

But naturally it was really hard to stick to 100%, so little by little I started re-incorporating foods back into my diet.  For a while I was straight vegan, and now I eat meat again.  I love coffee and I'm a bit of a boozer, but I still don't do much dairy.  I avoid the 'whites' and only use agave syrup or turbinado (or other natural) sugar.  Oh, and I try to avoid using the microwave, as it 'kills' your food.  Yes, it's true, shutup. 

Recent conversations and blogs I've read (I Want a Dumpster Baby) have gotten my wheels turning about this again.

As I've mentioned in previous blogs, I used to workout like a fiend, then I sprained a couple things and it all went downhill.  It's so hard to go back to working out after you've been off it for so long, isn't it?  I felt so good when I worked out, and I know I would again, but it's just the pain and suffering of starting that is holding my lazy ass back.  And I'm suffering for it too, I'm carrying some extra weight that I am NOT proud of or happy about whatsoever. 

But starting a new workout plan and doing a vegan cleanse hold the same intimidation factor for me.  Once I get going I know I'll be fine, but it's just those first rotten steps that f*cking slay me.  I need to be held accountable.  I need Tony Robbins to come over here and light a fire under my ass.  I need to be bossed around.  I need to be held accountable. 

So, I'm calling in reinforcements. 
O'mayra, vacation is OVER and the chocolate fountain should be in (temporary) retirement. 
Sam, I know you're starting too.  But will you hold my hand and pee on me if I get stung by a jellyfish? 
Libby, get your bossy ass in gear and don't let me get away with shit!  
IT'S ON, BITCHES!! 

You want to join us?  Everyone needs at least one accountability partner.  I'll be yours, if you'll be mine too.  If you've got questions about acceptable foods or how Cinch products can help you keep your sanity, let me know.  Pick up Skinny Bitch by Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin (it's in the Amazon bar at left) and check out the acid/alkaline site I posted above.  We all need support and someone to talk us down off the chocolate-coated ledge.  If you see me slacking, well, you know what to do.  This is an open invitation to kick my ass.  With the risk of sounding all lame and rah-rah-sis-boom-bah -  it's time to let go of what's comfortable.  If I can firewalk, I can do this.  You too.  Let's do it.

P.S.  I highly recommend the Tony Robbins UPW Seminar.  If you've ever had a single problem in your entire life, it's for you.  It's pricey, but if you wait long enough the tickets go on sale 2 for 1.  It's worth every penny.  Plus, you gotta love a guy who loves Shaklee. 

Mummy Dearest

We all know that processed convenience foods are not good for us.  Right?  RIGHT?  Of course we know that.  One of the reasons...as if we needed another...is preservatives.  What I'm about to tell you, be it hearsay or not, may convince you to never eat another 'preserved' food again.  Apparently, Americans consume so many preservative-laden foods each and every day that when we die, our bodies are not decomposing like they should.  Everything about that is just GROSS.

Did you know that typical grocery store brands of vitamins are so full of synthetic ingredients, that when port-o-potty companies clean them out they find whole vitamins in the holding tanks?  Those aren't the kind of vitamins I'd want to take.  I mean, what's the point?  I've heard the ridiculous argument before about why you shouldn't bother paying more for quality vitamins...the only difference it makes is that you have expensive pee.  I guess the port-o-potty findings take that to a whole new level.

You know all those food packages and signs at fast-food restaurants that claim 'No Trans Fats!'?  I'm sure you've seen them and been comforted by their presence.  Did you know that when you eat a food that contains hydrogenated oils that when your body processes them they get turned into trans fats?  Did you know?  Well you do now.  Nice marketing ploy guys, but we're on to you.

Don't fall for these advertising scams that claim 'corn sugar' (high fructose corn syrup) is a natural product.  No it's not!!  By whose freaking dumb ass standards???  Since HFCS has gotten such a bad rap, industry will try and cover their asses by changing the same to something so harmless sounding as 'corn sugar'.  How dumb do they think we are?  At this point I would hope that we are all aware of the damage that HFCS does to our bodies.  If not, read up folks.  Educate yourselves.  However natural the (GMO, but that's a whole different blog) ingredients used to make HFCS or corn sugar started out, rest assured that by the time they make it onto the shelf in the grocery store they have been processed beyond the point that they can be recognized as a natural food item.

I repeat, educate yourselves.  The government is not looking out for us.  The FDA and USDA have taken on a whole new meaning in my vocabulary, and those letters stand for something I shouldn't write here.  The best we can do is arm ourselves with knowledge.  We can all be healthier, and it really doesn't mean making huge extreme changes.  Pay attention to what you eat.  Read labels in the grocery store and have a list of ingredients that you avoid.  If that's too much work, then at least stick to the outer rim of the grocery and skip all the processed stuff in the middle.  None of us needs it.  I may have eaten a big, fat, beautiful reuben sandwich yesterday, but you bet it was organic pumpernickel bread, and organic 1000 Island, and organic sauerkraut.  Maybe the ingredients aren't the healthiest to begin with, but splurging on a less than ideal meal once in a while isn't going kill you as long as you put it together with the best ingredients you can. 

A friend of mine posted a blog today about how important it is that we take care of ourselves and I couldn't agree more. You're the only one of you there is and you've only got one body and it shouldn't end up mummified because of your diet.  No one else is going to take care of it for you, so get to it!!

Cheer up, baby chick!

This post is pretty personal and a bit of a testimonial, but will also hopefully serve as a ray of hope to some folks out there who deal with mood disorders or behavioral issues, whether in themselves or their family or friends.

My son recently turned 9.  He's a great kid, smart, very social, active in Taekwondo.  He is mine, I own him, and I love him to pieces.  I don't care how 'cool' he is...I will grab him and kiss him and squeeze the daylights out of him any time I please.  That's my boy.  My first, my oldest, my son.  Any parent knows what I'm talking about, you will do anything for your kids!

From the time he was a baby we knew we were in for a heck of ride - he has always been strong-willed.  At first it may seem an undesirable quality, especially in a small child, but strong-willed can be good!  If cultivated correctly, he can turn into one determined, confident, knows-what-he-wants-and-does-what-it-takes-to-get-it adult.  But recently he has seemed...out of sorts.  Honestly, he's been a miserable shit.  Moping around, being nasty with a bad attitude, seemingly upset or angry all the time.  I've had a hard time even talking to him because he's immediately defensive and angry.  This has not made for very pleasant family time!  I want my happy little boy back.

I've done a lot of thinking and worrying about him.  Should we see a counselor?  Is there something 'wrong' with him?  What am I doing wrong as a parent?  OMG, should he be medicated?  Maybe I'm not strict enough.  Maybe I'm TOO strict.  Could it be diet or allergies?  Do we not give him enough attention?  WTF is his PROBLEM?!?! 

As you may know, I am very health conscious and do what I can here at home with natural remedies first.  Naturally the first thing I think of is food allergies.  Maybe there's something he is eating that makes him act out.  It's certainly not unheard of!  (Food coloring is a big offender when it comes to behavior).  Over the past couple years I have cut the artificially colored, flavored and processed foods down to very little here at home.  No cow's milk, no meat with 'added hormones', etc.  Naturally, it's hard to control what goes on at the school lunch table or at friend's houses or where ever, but we do our best where we live and spend most of our time.  Unfortunately, this hasn't helped a whole lot with his attitude.   

Being a Shaklee distributor, I've learned so much about what supplements do what for you, and what happens when you're deficient.  One of the first things you learn is that B vitamins are your 'happy pill'.  Sounds good! Bottoms up, boy!  (And husband, and mother, and sister, and...kidding, kidding!)  So I've been giving the child a single B Complex tablet every morning with his breakfast, along with another Shaklee product called Moodlift Complex.  Moodlift contains St. John's Wort along with a proprietary blend that helps the St. John's Wort be more effective.

We've been doing this for a week now, and the difference is AMAZING.  He wakes up in the morning joking and energetic.  I've been communicating with his teacher by email all this week, and she has said that the boy is much more focused and on task at school all day. When he comes home from school he actually speaks to me and tells me how his day was!  He is agreeable and hasn't been nearly as argumentative as before.  The negativity is not completely gone, but it is so far in the background that if I was not overly conscious of it I'm not sure I would realize it was there.

I guess my point here is sometimes a little bit of the right stuff can make all the difference in the world.  Nutrition is such a huge part of our lives, and so many people don't realize how important it is and how it affects SO MUCH of what we do.  Too many times people resort to heavy medications to 'fix' a behavior that could easily be remedied by changes in diet or by supplementing a deficiency.  Not all cases of course...there are many children that need the heavier stuff on a daily basis, and there's nothing wrong with that.  Simple solutions aren't always going to work for everyone, I'm not trying to say they are.  But if you've been feeling down, don't run to the doc and get a prescription for Zoloft.  Try a natural remedy first - diet, fitness and nutrition.  You might be surprised!

How Not to be a 3-Weeker

I pulled up at my health club first thing Monday morning to find that the parking lot was packed with cars.  Oh yeah, all those New Year's resolutions put into effect, everybody's at the gym.  After my fitness class, my friend and I were walking out into the bitter cold and commenting on how unusually full the parking lot is, and how it will be a relief when all these '3-weekers' drop off so we can have our old parking spots back.  Yes, of course I know that's not very nice.  Sorry. 

Later the same day, I overheard a conversation where someone was commenting on how so many people join health clubs the first week of the new year, work out for three weeks, then fall off the wagon.  In the past two days I have heard or seen at least half a dozen other references to these poor folks who just can't seem to keep up with what they've committed to.

This got me to thinking.  What makes people drop off after 3 weeks or so?  Health and fitness is my business, so how can I help?

As someone who has been steadily working out for quite a while now, it is easy for me to say that I can't or won't go a whole week without working out, I love it too much, and I get off on the way it makes me feel.  But not everybody is like that.  And believe me, there are many days that I don't want to peel myself off the couch and away from the Hershey kisses and go out in the cold to the health club where I'm just going to do a bunch of stuff that makes me want to vomit.  Hey, I'm normal.  Relatively...

I think the key to sticking with it is getting visible results.  When you work out for a couple weeks and one day you're at home and happen to catch a glimpse of a tricep you didn't know existed other than to cause you pain, or your significant other says something like 'Boy, they really work your ass hard in those classes, don't they? I mean your ass is literally hard.', or you run up the stairs and aren't heaving at the top...now those are good feelings.  Those feelings make you want to work out more, right?  Hopefully!

If you've got a long road ahead of you, the results you get in those first couple of weeks may not be significant enough to keep you coming back for more.  So how do you get the bests results you can?  Lose weight at a healthy rate, build muscle, get stronger, fitter, healthier?  AND KEEP AT IT?!

1. Keep your eye on the prize.  Find a picture of someone with your body type who is fit and healthy looking.  Cut it out and post it up.  Or a swimsuit, or dress you want, or some reward you will give yourself when you reach your goal.  And don't make your goal something insane...set small goals to reach in a certain time frame.  'I will lose 10 pounds by March 1'.  Realistic!  Then when you reach that goal, go another 10.

2. Accountability is the word of the day!  Find a partner, and hold each other accountable.  A little friendly competition never hurt anybody!  I have a couple workout partners, and there are many days that they are dragging me to the gym, and vice versa!  But the thing is, we go.  We motivate each other, hold each other accountable, and we go and we do it and we complain the whole time, but we are getting the results we want.

3. Evaluate your diet.  By now we are all aware that McDonald's is not health food.  But other than cutting out the obvious - fast food, soda, sugar, etc., what else can you do?  Depending on how you shop, you may have to reprogram your brain.  Don't buy products that contain hydrogenated oils, high fructose corn syrup, or more than 20 ingredients - and that's being generous.  Keep it simple - the less ingredients, the better.  Add more alkalizing foods to your diet, and add more natural sources of Omegas, including a pure supplement (Shaklee, of course).  Start your day with protein, and I don't mean bacon.  Vegetable protein!!  Soy is your friend.  I have a protein shake or bar every morning, and I won't go without it.  My energy level all day is waaaay better when I start my day with a protein shake (Shaklee, of course).  Plus, the Leucine in Cinch shakes will help you lose fat while you retain muscle, among a million other awesome health benefits.  Don't fall for stuff like Vitamin Water.  Scam!  Muscle Milk.  Scam!  Slim Fast.  Scam!  These products are full of synthetic ingredients, hydrogenated oils, and SUGAR.  If you need more info on what foods are alkaline, go here www.energiseforlife.com for a free, printable list of alkaline foods.  If you need more info on the Cinch line of products, CLICK HERE .

Whatever you do, just get out there and do it!  It's the time for new beginnings, so make your fitness and health a priority and rework your schedule to make time to take care of yourself.  You've only go one body, and no one else is going to do it for you! 

P.S.  Because I would be doing you a disservice if I did not add this; Shaklee has an amazing Cinch offer right now through January 31...join membership, buy yourself a box of Vitalizer (or place other $70 order), and get over $100 worth of Cinch products for free to get you started.  Includes:  full size can of Cinch, full size box of Cinch tea, full size box of peanut butter snack bars, plus a pedometer, program guide, and 3 month subscription to cinchwellness.com.  Ya, I know!!  AWESOME!!!  http://greengiraffe.myshaklee.com

A Stiletto To The Heart

This entry has nothing to do with being green.  It has everything to do with me being the occasional mildly selfish fashion victim.  Though I will mention exercise briefly later on, so let's go ahead and loosely put this one under the heading of 'fitness'.

There's nothing wrong with being fashionably selfish once in a while, is there?  My fashion consultant would answer with a resounding NOOOOO.  I love my fashion consultant.  As a treat for you, here are some more of her words of wisdom; 'He knew I liked to shop when he married me.  This should come at no surprise.' and 'He wants his wife to look good, right?!'  Does that sound like a wise woman, or what?  Ya, you know it does.

So, my husband and I were invited to a wedding of an old friend this past weekend, a guy my husband used to be in a band with.  We knew about this wedding for months.  So naturally, I prepared.  I shopped for the right dress, shoes and accessories.  Needless to say, I'm a good shopper.  I found an awesomely hot, yet sophisticated dress for a steal, accessorized it (with the help of an anonymous former bridal consultant who happened to be on the other side of the jewelry display at just the right time for me to glean her opinion), and of course...the shoes.  Oh, the shoes!

Did I find the most wickedly fantastic black stilettos!!  They're gorgeous, even sitting in the box all packed in foam and tissue.  Boy was I looking forward to wearing them.  My feet would have died a thousand deaths, but damn, my calves would have looked goood.  I was so prepared, I even did extra crunches to look good in the dress.  Crunches blow.  Twenty-four feel like a million.

The dress, the shoes, the jewelry, the handsome and well-dressed husband.  The flu.

You better believe it.  I got the @##$%^& flu early Saturday morning. How can it be?  I rarely get sick, I take my Shaklee vitamins everyday, eat right and exercise.  I don't get the flu!  I'VE GOT THE WHOLE DAMN OUTFIT, THIS CAN'T HAPPEN, I HAVE TO WEAR IT!

Needless to say, there was no gorgeous outfit to celebrate a happy occasion, seeing some old friends and being happy for the couple who got married.  No, it was all laying in bed between trips to the bathroom and trying to sleep while dreaming of vomit.  Poor husband had to go himself.  Granted, he had a good time, but still.

And now he wants me to return the shoes.  It's like sacrilege!  A TRAGEDY.  Return the shoes?  But honey, did you SEE THEM???  He made a good point though, when the next occasion comes around I will be up for another excursion with my fashion consultant for a little retail therapy.  And giving up these amazing black stilettos is deserving of some therapy.  So I will do it.  This time.  Next time, the flu can bite me!!