Save the Children...Eat their Candy!

Ahhh candy.  Who doesn't love candy?  That's not a real question, of course everyone loves candy.  Halloween, Christmas, Valentine's Day, Easter.  Whole holidays with their own kind of devoted candy!  Yes, candy is good.  It seems that most people usually favor one type of candy over the other...chocolate vs. fruity.  I, myself, am hands-down a chocolate person.  I will pass up Twizzlers (gelatin rhymes with skeleton!) without a thought, skip the Skittles and Mike 'N Ikes, ignore the Jolly Ranchers and Laffy Taffy.  But put chocolate in front of me, and ooooh we've got trouble.  I will eat myself into a stomach-ache.  Yes, I lack control where chocolate is concerned.

That's why I don't normally buy candy.  Sure, I get the occasional hair up my ass chocolate craving and come home from the store with a couple of gorgeous Cadbury Fruit 'n Nut bars.  But if I have it I eat it till its gone, and if I have a constant supply...well, you get the picture.  So, these holidays come around to replenish my much unneeded secret supply.  You do have a stash spot, don't you?  Every parent needs one.  If candy is freely out in the open at my house, it is fair game for anyone and disappears VERY quickly.  Inevitably, those days come around when you just might actually die if you don't get at least a dang chocolate chip, and when that happens you best be prepared, mama!  Hook yourself up with a good stash spot. 

Now, there is good candy and bad candy.  I'm talking taste and quality here, folks.  Ever have that chocolate-flavored wax?  You know what I mean, especially if you like chocolate.  Companies out there are churning out the most disgusting, artificially flavored garbage, and because it's 'candy', people buy it and kids will eat it.  My kids won't even admit when candy isn't good - ever buy those gross-flavor Jelly Bellys, the ones first seen in Harry Potter?  We bought our son a box of them when he was 3 or 4.  He sat there and chewed on bacon, black pepper, baby powder, sardines, and soap, and though his face told us differently, he would not admit that they were gross.  I swear, as long as it falls under the heading 'candy'...kids will eat it. 

Of course candy isn't health food, that's no secret.  Unfortunately, reading the labels on candy is a necessary evil.  Besides the sugar, the fat, the fat on your body from the sugar, the cavities, your kids with a sugar-buzz...these are all good reasons to not eat it.  Now add in hydrogenation, HFCS, BHT, ridiculous amounts of food colorings, and who knows what else, and it turns into an even bigger problem.  Combine this with the 'fake' stuff - that chocolate-flavored lard I mentioned - and we're talking disgust-o-rama.  You know what's funny though?  People keep buying it.  Companies keep making it.  Have they even tried this stuff?  I would think - even hope - not.   

As many of your kids probably do, my kids get multiple Easter baskets.  The first came this past weekend, and my friend's kids got their firsts last weekend.  Coloring books, stickers, beach towels (my request, aren't I brilliant?!), some little toys and stuff.  A chocolate bunny, and one for each of them...FULL BAGS of Hershey's coconut cream-filled kisses and Reese's peanut butter eggs.  My friends kids also got full bags of marshmallow eggs, Tootsie Rolls (who eats those?), and blow pops.

For mine, one bag each is really minimal considering what they've gotten in the past.  Enter the Easter Egg Hunt.  I ended up with a plastic grocery bag FULL of foil-wrapped 'chocolate' coins, shaped 'chocolate' with a picture on the foil, those little 'chocolate' eggs with the rice krispies in them, jelly beans and robins eggs, mini peanut butter cups and a variety of kisses.  My husband ended up taking all this stuff to work.  What a waste!

That is, of course, it went to work after I sorted it.  You can't get rid of good chocolate and for the record, full-bags of peanut butter eggs must be confiscated immediately.  Cadbury eggs?  Hide 'em.  See's Candy?  You shouldn't have!  (But I'm glad you did).  Take it, stash it away for later.

You see, as long as kids aren't picky about their candy, there are certain types of candy that musn't be left in their hands.  Some kids won't even differentiate between booger-flavor beans and normal ones...and waxy chocolate vs. Godiva?  Forget it.  They will gobble it up, heedless of the quality.

This year when your kids get their Easter baskets, don't let them open anything right away.  Take it away, under the guise of sorting out the bad, hydrogenated, artificial garbage, sort out those quality candies and chocolates that only an adult connoisseur and consumer of 'the real stuff' can appreciate.  Find a good spot and hide it, then dole it out to yourself over the next couple of weeks. 

As long as the kids are left with a couple handfuls of the stuff they love, they will be thrilled.  They don't need mass amounts.  Remember when we were kids and we would trick or treat until 10 pm, and come home with a pillow case 3/4 full and so heavy we only came home cause we couldn't carry it anymore?  I often wonder why our parents let us do that!  We had candy for a YEAR, and anything that was left over by the next Halloween got thrown away, only cause there just wasn't room after bringing in the new haul.  Not any more!  My kids get to trick or treat for 2 or 3 hours, and whatever they get is what they get (after the adults pick out their favorites for 'the stash'), and it's not that much.

So, folks, here's what I charge you with:  When the Easter baskets (or Halloween bag, or stocking of Christmas goodies) come in, it is your right as a parent to sort it into three sections.  To the left set aside the really gross stuff, the over-colored, overly artificial, not-even-food-anymore garbage, then throw it away or send it to work before the kids even have a chance to miss it.  To the right set aside the really good stuff that your non-discriminating candy-gobblers won't miss anyway, and hide it away in your stash.  Whatever is left in the middle is theirs to keep.  Everybody wins.

You can thank me later...just send chocolate and I'll understand.

Who are you, anyway?

As many are, my business is about people.  I also like to get in other people's business, but that's neither here nor there.  My business is to help people get as healthy as possible, educate them so they make better choices, and heckle them incessantly until they listen to me.  FYI, I like being listened to.

Part of the social marketing training process is to figure out your 'sphere of influence'.  This is anyone and everyone that you 'touch'.  NO, you perv, not literally.  If your life touches their life in some way, they can be counted in your sphere.  Most of us have several hundred people we can count, whether we realize it or not.  Family, friends, co-workers, those are just the obvious.  The ones you might not think of...the lady at the post office, the one that stands behind you at Body Pump and admires your triceps, the cashier at the grocery store.  People that you don't even know their name, or in some cases, what they look like. Lots of people, lots and lots, influencing each other all over the place.

What we directly or indirectly influence people to do is a big part of who we are.  So, who are you?  And, now that you know that you have the potential to influence so many...what would you influence them to do?

Be trendy and wear particular clothes, or a particular bag.  Use a particular type of cell phone.  Wear a particular brand of work out clothes.  Walk a certain dog wearing a certain sweater on a particular street?  Maybe, but these things we can do without trying, and without making the other person's life any better or any worse.  I'm not a big fan of small dogs so I'd have to say maybe in the case of the dog it would be worse, but whatever.

How about if you set out specifically to influence people to only buy certain types of food or start a healthy eating plan?  Or to start a workout program?  It would probably improve the person's quality of life, and there you go being influential in a GOOD way.  Nice job, you!!  Doesn't it feel good?!

That's why I do what I do.  It makes me feel good.  It's part of who I am and I spread it around like butter, on everyone and everything I touch.  Shut up, that's not gross.  Our sphere of influence grows and changes all the time.  The opportunities that come up with these changes are invaluable to us, no matter what we are influencing.  I want to be sure that I am influencing positively, and I hope you do too.  Of course, being in business, there are business aspects to influencing my sphere too.

I was at a Shaklee event this past weekend where there were 12 guests, all part of my sphere.  They listened and learned, and bought a bunch of stuff that will improve their quality of life.  I'm influencing people in a very positive way that makes them feel good and be healthier. They will tell their families and friends, go to work and tell their co-workers, and onward and upward it grows and grows.  That's how I've grown my business as much as I have and have the success that I do, and you could too, by the way.  Sphere of influence!  And I can say with satisfaction that I'm a pretty darn good influence.  Who. I. Am.

So, have you figured it out yet?  You've got to be careful with this, cause it's a powerful tool - use the power of your sphere for good not evil!  If you would...think about it.  Then answer the question, and be sure to tell me cause inquiring minds want to know.

Who are you, anyway?

Your Garbage is My Pleasure

To my husband's irritation and annoyment, I am a big fan of Reduce, Reuse, Recycle.  My insistence on recycling every scrap of recyclable anything is a common recipient of 'the eye roll' and 'the exasperated sigh'.  Where we live we have those huge garbage and recycling cans, and everything goes into the one huge can that then gets emptied once a week.  Unfortunately, our recycling only gets emptied once every OTHER week.  Not cool for the obsessive recycler.  We had to have a second giant recycle can delivered, lest I throw away something recyclable and not be able to sleep at night.

An even bigger source of husband irritation and annoyment than my obsessive recycling is my love of all things reused or repurposed.  There is no end to the ways things can be used for something other than their original intended purpose!  A trowel for a coat hanger, a hay fork for a trellis, a piss-pot for a compost bucket, a yoke for a curtain rod.  These things all might sound absurd to you, but to me...they are bliss.  If they do sound absurd to you, damn you!, you are not alone.  My husband would heartily concur.  He calls my treasures 'junk'.  How dare he!  Only I am allowed to call it junk.

My most recent acquisition is this beautiful old cement wash basin.  I saw it posted on my local Freecycle and couldn't resist.  Told the husband about it and what I wanted to do, and he played along pretty well until we got there...and saw how monstrously huge this thing is.  These poor people had this 500 lb monstrosity taking up valuable real estate in their basement.  I mean, how the heck do you move something like that?  Back in the day they probably had to build the house around this thing, it's so huge.  And, I must add...gorgeous.

Double basin, steel lined, amazingly patinaed cement. 

Husband is giving me the 'run, quick!' eye, but I hardly notice as I am deep in thought about the potential of this behemoth.  This thing is going to be the best. Flower. Box. Ever.  The homeowner even brilliantly pointed out that each side has its own little drain, so drainage for a planting wouldn't be a problem at all.  If my husband could shoot daggers out of his eyes....

Naturally it couldn't be moved that day, we needed much more muscle involved.  The homeowner's pick-up, a couple of borrowed mercenaries, a smashed finger and a dirty jacket later, and it is in my yard in all its aged gargantuan glory.  And it will be glorious.  Mark my words. 

For some reason, my reasonable husband seems to be under the impression that my new cement friend will 'junk up' the yard.  Huh?  I think not.  Let's be realistic here...this is an old farmhouse, not some McMansion with $20,000 landscaping.  An old cement wash-basin as a flower box fits right in, next to the hay fork, tractor seat, hand-push lawnmower, and don't forget the old hand-made swingset!  It's all about vision, and that's something I've got and he doesn't. His vision is clouded by trips to the curb and navigating through a crowded garage. 

I mean, hello!!  Did I mention I am REUSING this item?  Keeping it out of a landfill, like the good little green girl I am.  It's not just my personal vintage style, it's my personal philosophy! 

Earth: Without it, we'd be aliens

As you are hopefully aware, it is (almost) April, the official sponsor of Earth Day. Of COURSE I'm going to dedicate a blog to it.  You do realize who you're dealing with here, right?

*Ahem*  In honor of Earth Day, I thought it would only be appropriate to dedicate a blog to the blue planet; home to one and all of you, my lovely readers.  Since it is so early in the month, if you haven't already thought of something earth-friendly that you and your family will do for Earth Day, now is the time to come up with something.  Why not?  It's a good learning experience, and any changes you make are only going to better everyone's quality of life.  Being the green goddess I am, I am going to make a few suggestions.  PICK ONE AND DO IT.  Ya, that's right, I'm gettin' bossy.  Don't make me come over there....

1. Still using those cruddy toxic cleaners?  Well hello, have I not mentioned Shaklee?  Come on, get with the program.  Shaklee's Get Clean line is fabulous, cheap, and the stuff works great.  You'll never go back to your smelly, asthma-inducing, cancer-causing, skin-removing toxic crap again.  It's eco-friendly, made with corn and coconut surfactants, and you can literally throw your dirty mop water out in the yard and your grass will be greener.  Plus, Basic H2 was the first official Earth Day product!  It biodegrades in 30 days, the wipes are compostable, and did you know that Shaklee was the first company to offset all carbon emissions?  Just flippin' try it, already.

2. You know you've got Rot Pot envy.  Get yourself a Rot Pot.  Seriously folks, start a compost!!  You can get one of those barrel-type composters that fit in any yard, and reap the benefits all year long.  It cuts down on garbage, and those of you who pay for garbage stickers should appreciate that.  Use the compost on your vegetable garden, and oh my, will you be glad you did it.  My tomato plants get as tall as me!!  It's easy, cheap (after the initial investment of the barrel), and worth it.  My pile is free...just fenced in with chicken wire on the side of my yard.

3. Are you recycling?  NO?!  Get your building, neighborhood or town to start.  You'll be everyone's hero, and who doesn't love a little hero-worship?  It's the 2000's, after all, everyone should be recycling.  It feels terrible to me to throw away, or see someone throw away, recyclable items.  I can't handle it.  I'm the kook digging in the garbage cans, taking home the recyclables so they don't end up in a landfill.  If we (planet Earth) continue the way we are going, imagine what life will be like for our grandchildren!  Full. Of. Garbage.  Is that what you want for them?  Ya, I didn't think so.  There's an activist in all of us, now get out there and activate it!

4.  Your community won't support recycling cause you live in the boonies?  REUSE.  Make some stuff and start a little business.  I've seen some great businesses online where people are cleaning up selling things made from reused items.  Mason jar chandeliers (very Pottery Barn!) go for a couple hundred bucks!  Knitted items from grocery bags, felted yarn goods from thrift store sweaters, endless items made from old reclaimed wood.  Get creative, it's a great outlet, and if you can make some dough doing it, kudos to you.

5. Did you know that if you measured and added up all the energy-escaping cracks in your home, it would on average add up to a hole 3 FEET in diameter?!  The cold is still here and the inevitable summer heat is coming.  It's never too early or too late to make your home more efficient.  Quit being such a primadonna, lower your thermostat and put on a sweater!  Fill those cracks in your home where cold air comes in or goes out, put in some new insulation, get some thermal shades.  Check your water heater, furnace and chimney, and if you're due and able, replace those old appliances.  If nothing else, you could be saving a boatload of money by keeping a tighter ship.

6.  Buy local.  Eat less meat.  Support companies and buy products that support the environment, and don't fall for 'greenwashing'.  Grow a vegetable garden.  Use reusable bags.  Turn off the dang lights.  Only run your washer and dishwasher when full - a full dishwasher is more efficient than washing the equivalent amount by hand!  Be conscious of how wasteful we all are.

I think that last one hits the nail on the head, don't you?  BE CONSCIOUS.  Pay attention to what you're doing, because in the long run it affects us all.  I could go on and on, but you know what to do.  We've only got one earth, and we better take care of it.  Even if our generation doesn't reap the fruits of our labors, future generations will appreciate what we've done to preserve what we can.  After all, what would we do without Earth?

The Clock is Always Ticking

I've been MIA.  No blog, no Facebook posts, no tweets.  My web presence has been nil.  Neglecting my email, voice mail (not like that's anything new), even snail mail.  Why?  I wish I had a fantastic reason like I've been visiting Portugal or working for world peace or feeding the hungry.  Nothing like that, though as it turns out, it is pretty fantastic.

Well jeez Bonnie, what HAVE you been doing?  I've been collecting.

That's what this post is about.  Collecting.  It isn't green or nutritious, and it isn't fit or eco-friendly.  You can print it out and compost it when you're done reading if you want, but I really wouldn't want you to waste the paper.

This post is about time, and friends, and homework for parents.  And collecting.  Yes, collecting.

I have found that I'm not the best time-manager, but I'm working on it.  Making schedules, planning my days, setting aside time to do the stuff I need to be doing to move onward and upward.  It's definitely helping!  My business coach recommended that I make a daily schedule for myself, down to the hour, for the things I have to get done or want to do get done.  An hour here for this, two hours there for that, and I am more productive than ever.  THAT, my friends, is for the things I can anticipate and control.  Sometimes stuff comes up that we have to address, and I find that I fall into this black hole of time-sucking frenzy.

One of my biggest time consumers recently has been 'The Kenosha Project'.  My son is in third grade, and apparently every third grader in the Kenosha area gets to do this project.  There are a few options of different types of projects the kids can choose from but by far the most popular one is to tour the area, taking pictures and gathering information, and then put the report together in scrapbook form.  Unfortunately, driving around town is not something a 3rd grader can do on their own. 

At first I really resented that this project had the requirements that it did because of the time involved. This is the kind of stuff I fondly refer to as 'parent homework'.  We were provided with a list of places to go to, and spent 2 whole days and part of another just driving around town from place to place.  (That's not including the time to put the report together!  Hours!)  We visited museums, memorials, statues, and signs.  Found inscriptions and gravestones, got stickers and collected clues.  Somewhere along the way it started turning into more of a scavenger hunt than an assignment.  We worked as a little team to beat the clock.  It was fun, and it was quality time.  Sure, it was educational, but the education part of it kind of took a back seat to the experience itself.  Taking silly pictures of my kid strategically placed to look like he is holding up the Jelly Belly jelly bean, or stopping at a long-time local drive-in for cheeseburgers and root beer floats - the boy even bought us lunch! We ended up having a great time together, collecting memories and experiences I will treasure and relive every time I open that scrapbook or revisit one of the many area sites.

Inevitably, the time came to put the report together.  I'm not a scrapbooker, nor am I exceptionally creative where visual arts are concerned, so needless to say my plan wasn't beautiful.  The boy is certainly no help in this department...he doesn't even like to do his regular homework, let alone some gorgeous scrapbook that takes hours if not days to put together.

My plan - what would have ultimately ended up as a total disgrace to the experience - was construction paper, hand-written descriptions, a picture, glue, hole punch, yarn, done.  If we happened to pick up anything else on the way, we could include that too.  Brochures, booklets, souvenirs of any kind.  Glue it on the paper, tie the papers together, and call it a report.  It's the information that's important, right?  Ya, so NOT.

In the thick of putting this report together I told my friend about what I was having the boy do.  She has a 4th and a 5th grader, and two Kenosha reports already under her belt.  Throw in a little scrapbooking, and we have ourselves one talented friend.  She must have been cringing at my description, and I'm sure her hands shook as she texted me to bring the stuff over - she would help.  NOW.  That tone came through text loud and clear.

Lucky for me she has a touch of craft-supply-hoarding, so she was well prepared with punch-out paper letters in every color of the rainbow and every font.  Little decorative stickers, glue pens, and tabs to put on the back of the pictures, an awesome binder that the pages came out of, background paper, even a little tool to round out edges, fancy scissors.  I was definitely out of my element, and basically just followed her directions.  We spent hours of cropping, measuring, matching colors and making layouts, gluey fingers and eyestrain, it came together.  Needless to say, thanks to her the report turned out great, and time spent with a friend is always good.  More collecting.

But let me tell you, he better get an A++ cause damn it I'm 36 and I can do the work of a 3rd grader well, thank you very much. 

We all like to be rewarded or recognized for time spent and a job well done just as much as the next guy.  But as parents, or small business owners, or housewives, or any combination thereof, our rewards can be a little different.  Our kid gets a good grade or a 1st place and its a reward for us too, no doubt.  But what about all the time spent driving people around, sitting through sports practice and games, grocery shopping and errand running?  I reward myself with backed up laundry and a dirty kitchen floor.  But it's ok, cause in the end its all for the greater good.

This past weekend was spent going to and from Pennsylvania for a taekwondo tournament.  Nine hours there, nine hours back.  Out of 5 kids there were half-dozen 1st places, twice as many 2nds, 3rds and 4ths, good sportsmanship and support, hours of conversation and silliness.  A long drive?  Yes.  But the collection of memories and experiences from this weekend was well worth it. 

I promise to manage my time better so I can help myself too, because it's all really a big circle, isn't it?  We help ourselves and therefore help them, and by helping them we help ourselves.  We collect joy from their successes, and hugs and snuggles and tears from their not-so-successes.  We get satisfaction from our own accomplishments, and when we've accomplished what we planned we feel better about the time we've spent and have more to offer them when it's their time. 

I promise to stop and think about the experience and what we've all reaped from it before I complain about how much time it took.  Time flies by us, but we really need to stop and look at what we've collected along the way, cause the collection is really the whole point.









 

The Ghosts of Products Past

As I am sure many of you did, I grew up with bleach, ammonia, Tide, Downy, Mr. Bubble, and Twinkies.  Little Debbie oatmeal cream pies were the best, and who can forget your mom's Diet Chocolate Fudge Soda, chock full of artificial sweeteners and who knows what else.  Remember getting the first Equal gumballs in the newspaper insert?  I do, and I ate the first one (and I still don't like aspartame).  The tub got scrubbed with the worst of the worst cleaners, and then we soaked up the residue in our baths.  Baby powder fights, weird concoctions of lotions to slather on, bare hands touching chemicals of all kinds.  To compound my chemical exposure, when I was a teenager I got a job at a pet store.  Every day, I would go in and bleach the heck out of the puppy kennels...with bare hands, inhaling the fumes.  But we all turned out ok, didn't we?

Ok, let's not actually answer that.

The first green products I learned about were for cleaning.  One day I was bleaching my kitchen floor...the next day I was packing up all the toxic stuff and sending it off to the garage.  I started using Seventh Generation, Method, Green Works, and a few others.  They were expensive and not usually effective, but I was dedicated to using green products and stuck with them.  (This was before I discovered Shaklee).

Very shortly after my cleaning product revelation came my enlightenment about personal products.  I packed up all our Pantene, Bath & Body Works, Johnson's and whatnot, and offered the fuller bottles to my mom and sister.  What they didn't absorb (no pun intended) got squirted into the garbage or the toilet, and the bottle recycled.  Ya, seriously, I stood there and emptied each bottle so I could recycle it.  Who DOES that?  Anyway, I was left with a few items I couldn't get rid of 'just in case' and of course I get stuff now and then that I'll never use...whether by gift or freebie or whatever.  These unusables get stashed away and forgotten.

In my quest to replace everything we ever use anywhere, there was definitely a trial and error process.  There have been numerous natural products that have not worked out, and end up sitting in a cabinet or closet.  Just because it's natural or non-toxic doesn't mean it's going to work or be the right product for us.  The Beebs and I found that out the hard way.  After a very scary incident with an allergic reaction to the 'Fragrance' in a Burt's Bees baby wash (97.3% natural!), and a very humorous incident (I wasn't the one laughing) with a face wash/lotion for me where I ended up looking like I had lobster-red sunburn on my face, I realized that not everything from the health food store is going to automatically be the right product. 

So the question is:  Where do your abandoned products go?

Well, I suppose we can call it the product graveyard.  I've definitely got one and to my husband's chagrin it is in the garage.  A big old cardboard box full of Windex, bleach, wipes, bathroom cleaners, kitchen cleaners, floor cleaners and more; all full of the type of chemicals that I do NOT allow in my house anymore.  Pretty much all my Shaklee cohorts have a similar box in their garage.  And those personal products...?  Lucky for me I've got a little extra storage space in the bathroom closet.  I'll never use that paraben-laden sunscreen on the kids, or the lotions, or makeup, or hair products, but there it sits.  I don't even use perfume, though I have half-dozen bottles of it sitting in the closet.

Crazy, you say?  I'll admit to a little crazy.  But the thing is...I've done a lot of research on this stuff.  I might seem paranoid or over-the-top to some, and others might say they are way too attached to their signature fragrance or mascara or favorite bathroom cleaner to ever give it up.  Fine.  I'm not trying to convince you to give up what you love.  Do what you want.  But be informed about what it is you are bringing into your home or putting on your body, especially if you have kids at home. I could use this opportunity to tell you how great and green and non-toxic everything Shaklee makes is and how that's mostly what we use now, but me selling you better products is not the point here. 

The point is simply:  When you've come to your senses and learned enough about the ill-effects chemicals can have on your family's health, and you replace all your bad stuff with good stuff, there is a solution for all those unused products!  And it's not that you have to stand at your garbage can squirting out six bottles of Johnson's baby lotion!

The easiest and most economical way to get rid of these chemicals is to use them up.  Then you can recycle the bottle and be done with it.  If you don't want to do that, and I don't blame you for not, read on.

Toxic products can't actually be recycled, per se.  Disposing of chemicals improperly can cause a lot of environmental problems like soil and water contamination...check out what happens from chemical runoff.  You can take your stuff to a hazardous waste collection facility, or most communities often host events for gathering all the unwanted products...and some even do it year-round.  Contact your village or your local solid waste or sanitation department to find out when and where you can take yours.  Hopefully there isn't some dude in each town with a garage full of cardboard boxes...

For anyone who didn't notice the first time...let me point out that these products are considered hazardous waste!  If they have to be taken to a hazardous waste collection facility to be disposed of...why are you using them in your home?!?!

To find out what products are bad, check out this awesome glossary, or visit EWG and Cosmetics Database. To get the green and non-toxic products that you now know are much better for you, go here. My intention is to educate you about healthier products so you can make better choices.  If your choices include Shaklee, great.  If not, that's ok too.  I am just as happy hearing that you learned something here and will stop using the toxic chemicals you've read about!!

Stow High In Transit

I received an email the other day about a very well-known four-letter word, that is actually an acronym.  I read the email, gave it a raised eyebrow-shrug-hmmm and deleted it and moved on.  But ever since, I've been thinking about it.  Yep, I've been thinking about S.H.I.T.

A little history lesson first:  A zillion years ago when manure used to be transported by ship, it would be dried out and packed so it was nice and light.  Well, naturally once the sturdy wooden ship hit the roiling seas, the manure would inevitably get wet, causing all kinds of bloaty, smelly, even explosive problems.  So, those smarty sailors started posting signs that said Stow High In Transit... as in keep it off the floor of the boat.  Voila, the creation of shit.  I mean S.H.I.T.  Is it a true story?  Like it matters.  It works for me, and its about to work for you, too.

So, speaking of all things poo...

If you have a pet, I'm sure you've seen all the lovely organic products you can bestow on them.  Natural cat litter for your kitty's delicate pee-pee, 'natural' dog food (good luck with that one, I can't even feed my kid organic cereal), I even pondered the possibility of organic cardboard for my daughter's guinea pig. 

I've tried a couple of these products, but always seem to revert back to good old Purina.  Yes, animal lovers, I know.  Shut up.

A couple years ago I got a great deal on this cat litter made from corn by-products.  It advertised no dust to choke you and your poor kitty, biodegradable, no scent to irritate, yada yada.  I had a wicked coupon, so it was a done deal.  Took my 2 bags of natural kitty litter home, feeling all like such a good pet owner and all self-satisfied with my organicalism.  I get this stuff home and fill the litter box with it, and almost barf my guts out at how bad this stuff smells.  And this is BEFORE there was any poo in it!  Fresh out of the bag and this stuff was already wretched.  It was definitely a source of contention with the other members of my household until it was gone.  So I guess I'm scarred for life, cause I haven't tried 'natural' litter since. 

Moving on.

I love my dog.  She's a 10 year old boxer named Stella, she has a big weird bumpy lumpy thing on her butt cheek, she has the worst breath in the world, and some of her bottom teeth stick out over her lip.  She's got a great smile!  I think she may be at least half goat, cause she'll eat anything (except natural dog food).  She'll eat pretty much everything else. Come to think of it, I think boxers are probably descended from goats and deer.  Any boxer-parent knows what I'm talking about.  Anyway, she's gorgeous and she is the best dog ever ever in the world and that's not just cause she's mine.  If you met her you'd like her better than your dog too. 

See what I mean?  Don't be jealous, and no you can't have her.

Except for this one little problem...well, ok there's many.  But here are two of the most relevant: 

1. She's really bad for my indoor air quality.  Her gas...oh God.  Is this due to the un-organic food I give her?  Am I ruining her poor little body cause I'm too cheap to let Paul Newman feed her?  I've tried the natural stuff on her...not even close.  Boxers have very expressive faces. One look from Stella and it's all over...you know exactly what she's thinking and it is clearly that there is no way she was going to eat that particular food.  Good intentions aside, I'm not going to spend a lot of money on dog food that my dog won't eat.  Simple.  End of story.

2. Stella thinks that the cat's litter box is her own personal cookie jar.  Time for a litter fritter, Stella?  This certainly doesn't help with the breath situation.  What's a dogmom to do?  I mean, I feed the cats (very) un-organic food, and I use that dusty, perfumey, cruddy litter!  If it's good enough for my dog to sneak off, tiptoe (yes, she tiptoes!) over to the laundry room to quietly rummage through the box for her little morsel of goodness, and risk getting in trouble cause you KNOW mama's got ears like a hawk...the cat food must be pretty darn good.

So, it comes around again - am I damaging my pets by not feeding them organic and letting them pee on recycled newspaper or vegetable by-products?  I don't know.  I mean, I hope not.  But the stuff is expensive, and you know how it is when you change your pet's food...there's no guarantee they're going to eat it.  My BFF tried to feed her cats this fancy food with mini-shrimp and gravy and stuff...they tried to bury it like it was a turd.  Lucky for my friend she got it for free and wasn't out any money.

I've heard people say some natural or safe cat litters are great, and I'm sure they are.  For those people.  I've heard of people who feed their dogs all 'real food' like raw meat and rice and whatnot.  That is some dedicated dog-parenting, I tell ya.  Good for them, huh?!  But I'm not gonna do it.  Maybe one of these days I will find another coupon and get one of those healthier pet products for cheap, we'll all love it, Stella will even love it a second time around, and me and my zoo will live happily ever after.  But for now - or until I win the lottery and hire my pets a personal chef and maid - I will have to stick with what I can afford and what doesn't offend my senses any more than necessary.

Sorry, pets....I do love you!!  Now come here and let me squeeze the S.H.I.T. out of you!!

Post Script:  I just realized that there is something eco-friendly I do for my dog.  I wash her in Basic H2!!  You know, Shaklee's organic cleaning concentrate that cleans everything you could ever imagine, including your pets.  Yay, I'm a good dogmom after all!!