A Stiletto To The Heart

This entry has nothing to do with being green.  It has everything to do with me being the occasional mildly selfish fashion victim.  Though I will mention exercise briefly later on, so let's go ahead and loosely put this one under the heading of 'fitness'.

There's nothing wrong with being fashionably selfish once in a while, is there?  My fashion consultant would answer with a resounding NOOOOO.  I love my fashion consultant.  As a treat for you, here are some more of her words of wisdom; 'He knew I liked to shop when he married me.  This should come at no surprise.' and 'He wants his wife to look good, right?!'  Does that sound like a wise woman, or what?  Ya, you know it does.

So, my husband and I were invited to a wedding of an old friend this past weekend, a guy my husband used to be in a band with.  We knew about this wedding for months.  So naturally, I prepared.  I shopped for the right dress, shoes and accessories.  Needless to say, I'm a good shopper.  I found an awesomely hot, yet sophisticated dress for a steal, accessorized it (with the help of an anonymous former bridal consultant who happened to be on the other side of the jewelry display at just the right time for me to glean her opinion), and of course...the shoes.  Oh, the shoes!

Did I find the most wickedly fantastic black stilettos!!  They're gorgeous, even sitting in the box all packed in foam and tissue.  Boy was I looking forward to wearing them.  My feet would have died a thousand deaths, but damn, my calves would have looked goood.  I was so prepared, I even did extra crunches to look good in the dress.  Crunches blow.  Twenty-four feel like a million.

The dress, the shoes, the jewelry, the handsome and well-dressed husband.  The flu.

You better believe it.  I got the @##$%^& flu early Saturday morning. How can it be?  I rarely get sick, I take my Shaklee vitamins everyday, eat right and exercise.  I don't get the flu!  I'VE GOT THE WHOLE DAMN OUTFIT, THIS CAN'T HAPPEN, I HAVE TO WEAR IT!

Needless to say, there was no gorgeous outfit to celebrate a happy occasion, seeing some old friends and being happy for the couple who got married.  No, it was all laying in bed between trips to the bathroom and trying to sleep while dreaming of vomit.  Poor husband had to go himself.  Granted, he had a good time, but still.

And now he wants me to return the shoes.  It's like sacrilege!  A TRAGEDY.  Return the shoes?  But honey, did you SEE THEM???  He made a good point though, when the next occasion comes around I will be up for another excursion with my fashion consultant for a little retail therapy.  And giving up these amazing black stilettos is deserving of some therapy.  So I will do it.  This time.  Next time, the flu can bite me!!

Drinking coffee till I vibrate is bad, bad, bad.

The other day I ran across a blurb somewhere that said ‘drinking two or more cups of coffee a day makes it near impossible to burn fat’.  Hmm.  You don’t say.  That explains things a little bit.

I wonder then, how it is that us ‘normal’ people are supposed to get all jacked-up enough every morning to get kids clean and dressed, lunches made, snacks packed, homework located, and their bodies thrown out the door in time for the bus to scoop them up and away from us, so that we may actually shower by ourselves once in a while.

Apparently… <insert giant exasperated eye roll>  coffee makes your body acidic, and when you’re in an ‘acid state’ you retain the fat from every little bite of cheesecake and breakfast sausage that crosses your lips.  In order for you to burn off that retained fat, your acid level must decrease.  Which of course means ‘stop drinking all that coffee’, among other things of course.  The other things I can handle…I’m not big on sugary sweets, not a big meat eater, don’t booze it up more than your average stay-at-home mom, etc….but coffee?  Come on, not coffee!! 

I guess I am off to the tea section at the grocery store, and I haven’t had my coffee today, so watch out!!

Can we have ice cream for dinner?

Hi, and welcome!
Since this is my first blog, I imagine introducing myself is in order. I'm a stay-at-home mom of 2 with my own health & wellness business. I try to keep my house as green as it is possible for us; we compost, recycle, grow vegetables in the garden, reuse, reduce, etc. I buy organic. We don't use products with 'bad' chemicals to clean, do laundry, or wash our hair and faces. In the winter our heat is set to 62 degrees during the day (I wish I could take credit for that one, but its really my husband being cheap). My kids know we do not eat certain things, and words like 'hydrogenated' in the ingredients mean its BAD.

That said, I should also mention that I live in a fantasy world where everyone happily does what I want them to.

My 5 year old is usually pretty compliant. Eats what I give her, doesn't complain too much, tries new food items, etc. But every so often she gets a feeling of entitlement when it comes to deciding what she wants for any particular meal, and makes sure I understand that there will be no substitute for what she has decided is on the menu. Ice cream for dinner, or for that matter Doritos for breakfast, are not usually part of the idealistic meal plans I fantasize about.

I have these daydreams where my family is all sitting at the table, getting along, talking about school and work and friends and sports, and happily eating the wonderful, healthy, organic, vegetarian dinner full of nutrients and green vegetables! that I've prepared for them. Yeah, right. The kids whining about Ding Dongs break through my reverie every time.

I really admire those parents whose kids would never dream of asking for Little Debbie at the store. But one has to wonder...how did they do it? Hypnotism? Beatings? WHAT??? Could someone please let me know?!